A belated Happy Mother's Day to all mom's out there! We were privileged to speak with Former Vice-President of The United States, Joe Biden this past weekend. Portions have been edited for clarity, length and to limit awkward pauses.
CS: Mr. Vice-President, Thank you for joining us today.
JB: Mika, please just hear me out...I. Did. Not. Do. It. And...happy to be here in the great state of Delaware!
CS: Thanks Joe...um you're speaking with ConlinSense not MorningJoe...you can call me Jay.
JB: Makes no difference to me just glad to hear Mika finally took no for an answer....she did right?
CS: Sort of...as you know it was just Mother's Day weekend. Any messages for all those mom's out there?
JB: Yes! I didn't do it!!
CS: Anything else...?
JB: Well Joe, I think Mika was too hard on me so I am glad I don't have to live with her....no idea how you do it bud....
CS: OK....um...so Corona Virus...thoughts on the efforts to contain and stop it?
JB: Terrible...terrible illness, terrible impact on our people, nation and economy. Terrible guy pretending to be President getting in the way...terrible interview with Mika too I might add...I've got a Mother's Day message for her all right.
CS: As President what would you do to stop the Corona Virus?
JB: Jane, I'd do a number of things...simple things that Trump keeps avoiding. Take that Fauci guy...smart as heck...clone him!! Clone him and make like twelve of him. Why not...the guy is smart. I'd also test anything and everything and do more of what isn't being done, create task forces, enlist the National Guard...ban assault rifles refund defunded agencies...send a family to Mars....
CS: Anything more specific?
JB: Take the Trump "Plan" and basically do the opposite.
CS: How has it been campaigning for President under the quarantine...?
JB: Great! Never better. I sit at home, can snack and nap when I want...tape a message or two....they edit them pretty heavily for some reason. No jet lag...I'm loving it. I miss the train a bit...
CS: How did you feel when Trump was holding his daily press conferences?
JB: Confident! Are you kidding me Diane? That guy is his own worst enemy. I kept emailing and tweeting just to make sure he would keep doing them. If I lose to this guy....oh man...they asked me not to say that.
CS: You had a call with Trump not that long ago...what did you talk about?
JB: No idea! He rambled on about things...some wall...a place called Ji-na...golf...he hates Bernie even more than Hillary by the way.
CS: What did you say back?
JB: Nothing...I did not want to make some sort of gaff he could hold on to...that guy is a nasty tweeter...I blocked him...well my staff did...I have no idea what that does or means but they told me they did it...blocked him. I am going to ask them to block Mika next...
CS: COVID-19, record unemployment, a divided country...why on earth would you want to be President?
JB: Hey, could the bar be any lower? Savannah I'm telling you the only guy worse than Donald Trump as President would be me in 1994...but now...I'm clearly better...just stay quiet and let him lose this thing...that's our plan...but seriously as the late, great John Fitzgeraldine Kennedy said..."Ask not when your country...um ask your country to...well just don't ask too many questions..."
CS: What are you most proud of during your career?
JB: Oh there are too many great accomplishments shared by so many people...I guess reaching "Conductor" status on Amtrak....
CS: If you win this fall you will be seventy-eight years old...any concerns?
JB: You bet! Things don't work like they did when I was fifty-eight but as Ronald Reagan said to Walter Mondale..." I won't let the fact that I cannot remember my address impact his chances...no wait...my experience is big, ahh better, BETTER than yours"....listen, I'm not eighty ok?
CS: Last thoughts on Donald Trump?
JB: Smartest guy in the room...as long as he's alone...
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